Some relationship gurus suggest that the key to a successful relationship is to be able to listen with your heart as well as your ears, but some couples hardly manage to do one, let alone achieve both ways of listening to each other.

Not paying attention and listening to what your partner has to say could ultimately create divisions in the relationship that might just end up with a visit to a site like DivorceGuru.com, so here is a look at why communication is often considered to be the foundation of a successful marriage.

Finding the key to a successful relationship

It is probably hard to overemphasize the point that many so-called relationships experts often pinpoint as the key to a successful relationship, which is that if you fail to find an effective and healthy way of conveying your thoughts and emotions to other, this will probably ultimately cause the partnership to fail.

The reason that you are a couple and are spending your life together at this point is that you presumably have found features and personality traits within each other that has proved to be a magnetic attraction, but in order to enjoy longevity in the relationship, it will help if you can develop excellent communication skills.

What this means is that you need to be in tune with each other enough to be able to understand not just what your partner is saying, but what they also mean as well. This is because there is often an underlying message or desire that you need to be able to decipher.

Become a good listener

Every relationship has its own individualistic personality traits that are unique in some way to you both as a couple, but on a general basis, one of the most essential components of a successful marriage, is to demonstrate an ability to be a good listener.

How many of us are truly listening attentively when your partner is speaking, or is your mind wandering to other events and things that you need to do?

It can often be the case that you can get so involved in getting your point of view across in an argument or even a debate, that you are not actually listening to what your partner is saying. If you did stop and listen, you might discover that your opinions are not as different as you first thought.

Rewards for listening

The ultimate reward for paying attention and listening to what your partner is saying, is that you get to truly understand not just what they have said, but more importantly, the meaning, feeling and sentiment of what is being said, which very often goes much deeper than the mere words spoken.

Listening properly allows you to gain a greater understanding of your partner’s needs and desires, and more often than you might think, listening will help you to solve a particular problem and even potentially avoid any unnecessary conflict.

If you are able to pay attention and listen in non-judgmental way, this is a trait that could help you to form a successful partnership.

Jonathan Glover has worked as a marriage and family therapist for several years. He discusses some of the top relationship issues, along with ways to fix them in his articles.