People often read about how to build the mood with their partners for sex. There are many lines which can certainly kill all the joy and could play spoil sport. People don’t realize that apart from annoying bedroom habits, extreme intimate gestures, wrong sexual positions, disliked physical attributes; there are certain unintentional things, which, if said at the wrong time, can act as libido killers. It’s evident that while having sex, there are several things on a couple’s mind but the issue creeps up when couples let these things come in way of those most cherished moments and thus end up killing the passion.
It is rightly said that sex is the art of love and it must be done in the most enjoyable and most satisfying manner. To enjoy this intimate and private activity, couples shall let go of all their apprehensions, fears and insecurities. But unfortunately, the looming anxieties find their ways into our bedroom lives.
Sex is to be enjoyed in the present and if any partner thinks about impending things from past or future, it would act as disruption. Saying anything outside your bedroom conversations will become a deviation. Your partner might feel offended and unloved. Understand the fact that your partner will not accept anything outside your intimacy, to enter your isolated sexual moments, and hence such intrusion is highly opposed.
Top 10 Spoil Sport lines that couples must avoid saying in bed:
Are you enjoying?
It’s good to be communicative with your partner about things that are enjoyed or disliked in bed but that doesn’t mean you start interrupting in between the act thus killing the heating passion. Asking your partner again and again to evaluate your performance and speak out their pleasure level might just leave them irked and it is a symptom of performance anxiety where you are more concerned about how the act is progressing and less focused on the pleasure quotient. You maybe either too probing whether your partner is enjoying or too anxious whether you’re able to give satisfactory amount of pleasure.
Are you through darling?
Again, this is a repetitive mistake that most couples would make in bed. Sex is something you should enjoy not obligate, so treat it like a necessity of life not a duty that has to be fulfilled each time you get intimate. If you keep interrogating your partner on whether they’re through with the act might sound like you’re no more interested in the act and waiting for it to get over soon. It also makes your partner feels apprehensive if the sexual act is becoming a burden on you, so try and avoid being too inquisitive rather let your partner also enjoy the act as much as you.
Shall we turn off the lights?
Many a times, a partner would suddenly disrupt in between a steamy sex session only to ask that whether they should now turn off the lights, without realizing that it might just delay their partner’s smooth act towards the peak point. You are not making love in public anyways so it shouldn’t matter.
I think I forgot to take the pill
No matter how much a women charged up for a pleasurable night, they can’t get rid of the disturbing reminders about the contraceptive pill. Imagine your partner is about to reach the climax and you abruptly get up saying that you forgot to take the pill. Mood killer isn’t it! There are various pills available these days which you can take even after many hours of unprotected sex so don’t worry if you forgot your regular pills.
You’re far better than my ex
Try and think more about your current partner and thus leaving no space for your past relations to obstruct your sexual life. Males often find themselves in a fix where they end up comparing their present bedroom partner either with his ex or someone he fantasizes about, without realizing what harm it can do to his relation. Comparison can sometimes be the most offensive gesture you can show to your partner and if that happens in the bed, tables can really turn around. While in bed, couples shall think of their quality time meant for uninterrupted comfort. Nothing said is unintentional, it comes only because it’s there somewhere in your mind. No wife or girlfriend would accept his man thinking about another woman and moreover expressing it while making love.
You must hit the gym soon
Apart from the bedroom anxieties, there are several things that keep hovering couples’ mind and act as wreckers in their sexual life. It’s good to comment your partner about their physical attributes but there has to be a right tie for it. Pointing your wife’s weight gain and suggesting her to hit the gym next morning can be good but doing this while having sex can act as the deadliest wrecker. Such expressions reflect your sheer concern or disliking towards your partner’s body issues, which ideally shouldn’t cause a trouble in your sexual life. Many individuals are particular about their partner’s weight, body hair, bulging belly etc and commenting on these attributes while having sex may make your partner feel snubbed. It also shows how unenthusiastically you’re involved in the act of love and instead concentrating on other areas.
Office was pretty hectic today
When boardroom stress descends to the bedroom, it is sure to cause doldrums in sexual pleasure. While the man would always have office dilemmas on his mind, but the issue comes in when he unexpectedly expresses it out while having sex and pollutes the romantic mood. Don’t let your boardroom stress slips to your bedroom.
What’s in breakfast tomorrow?
Be it men or women intending to discuss the breakfast menu in bed, it will only irritate the other partner, who was expecting some happy sex moments sans routine conversations. Expressing these subconscious thoughts suggests that either you’re too hungry for food at the moment or you’re least interested in the act and are planning for the next day.
How are kids doing in school?
Though this is a very petty area on which a couple can actually end up fighting or killing their pleasure but if this is the case, it has to be understood that your partner needs undivided attention in bed. Even talking of kids, at a time which is meant for pleasure, can make them feel abandoned. So, try and talk out these things over dinner or a phone cal during the day but reserve the bedroom moments exclusively for your partner.
Have you paid the pending bills?
Men are always worried about these impending household expenses but they fail to prioritize their concerns. Asking or mentioning such things while having sex would of course be a turn off for the other partner, so the only way to deal with it could be a prolonged foreplay so that you only concentrate on the pleasure act and leave all other tensions outside the bedroom. Some partners do have a tendency to get full report of monthly household expenses but such things can be well discussed at dinner table, why let them invade your comfort moments and disrupt the bedroom life.
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