It is very well said and known that marriages are made in heaven, agreed! But what about in-laws do we can’t have any option of choosing them? Every single dream of a girl is shattered most of the times because of the interference in her married life of her in – laws. The in-laws generally try to exercise a control and influence on their sons, which sometimes make a wife feel as her husband is a stranger. A unknown gap start building between them, which the two may want to remove but fails to do so.
The mother -in- laws behavior sometimes seems very strange and non- understanding which is very well explained in my previous article Mother- in – law toughest to deal with . This situation is more worsen if you are living in joint family, But does staying apart is relief? The answer from a wife would be no.
The in- laws in this condition wants you to call them daily and give an update of daily happenings. But this situation here becomes tricky………..if you call, you have to face criticism for one or other reason and if you don’t you are the worst. Here are few tips that might help you face the situation :
It is world known fact that in-laws can never be parents, so always keep a distance and don’t keep any expectation as broken expectation will also shatter you.
Be respectful and polite, but it does not mean you should lose your self respect and dignity. The key to be manipulative, say your views and idea in a polite way.
Call when Required
Excessive calls to in-las will not bring you near to them , but will bring you useless criticism on one or the other reason. So make sure you call when required.
Have your own Finances Saved for you
If you are working, maintain your own bank balance. If you are not working try to maintain a saving account for making you self dependent.
Just be your- self
From your busy schedule of homemaker, take out some time for yourself. Devote some time for your hobby like- dancing, music, painting etc daily just to keep yourself energized and full of life.
Staying on Holidays
Set your priorities in beginning only. Don’t try to be goody-goody. If you are going for few days then stay at your in-laws for some hours may be a day or a two and spend your vacation at your parents house the way you want to be. any women is often heard saying ‘I sacrificed so much for my in-laws but they don’t appreciate anything and treat me so badly’. If you don’t sacrifice anything, you will be treated better and will have peace of mind.
Ignore as much as possible
You will be often landing up in a situation were you will held responsible for the things you haven;t done or was not your mistake. don;t panic just stay cool and clam, don’t stress yourself , say whatever you want to say in a polite manner. if heard fine, if not – you just don’t brother.
Every woman in life once goes through the in-laws trauma. Would aperricate your experience sharing with us, so as some of our would be daughter – in – laws will get benefited from our experience, and hopefully will be able to understand the situation better. So all of you kindly share your experience and help your sisters!